“Paint me with diamond earrings”

An elderly woman decided to have her portrait painted. She instructed the artist, 'Paint me with diamond earrings, an emerald necklace, a ruby bracelet, and a Rolex watch.'
'But you're not wearing any of those things!' the artist said.
'I know,' she replied. 'But if I should die before my husband, I'm sure he'll remarry right away, and I want his new wife to go crazy looking for the jewelry!'

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